Excuse me, can I kiss you?
Posted by Jonah Lopin on Sat, Oct 10, 2009 @ 04:58 PM
I developed a technique for creating an awkward and somewhat entertaining misunderstanding with Chinese women while living in Beijing. I should point out that I never actually tried this since I was too shy!! But I think it might have been funny.
If you want to interrupt a stranger to ask a question in China, perhaps to ask directions or the time of day, you might use the following phrase:
对不起，我问你一下。。。
对不起 = dui4 bu4 qi2 = "opposite" + "not" + "angry" = excuse me
我问你一下 = wo3 wen4 ni3 yi2 xia4 = "I" + "ask" + "you" + "1"+ "time" = may I ask...
This is a polight way to get someone's attention before beginning a conversation.
My innovation is to substitute the word 吻 [=wen3 = to kiss] for the word 问 [=wen4 = to ask]. Since only the tone is different, Chinese people will assume you mispronounced the word accidentally (assuming you're not Asian). So the phrase goes:
对不起，我吻你一下。。。
Which is a polight way of saying "excuse me, may I kiss you?"
Deliver the line, then pause for giggles.
(Comment back here if you actually try this... it's all theoretical at this point.)